Synopsis No Wit, No Help Like a Woman's

1 synopsis

1.1 act i
1.2 act ii
1.3 act iii
1.4 act iv
1.5 act v

synopsis

prologue

the prologue notes difficult please in audience because has come different reasons: wit, costumes, comedy, passion, , arrange lascivious meeting. but, despite this, prologue confident that, long can pay attention , understand play, satisfactorily entertained.

act i

scene 1: street near sir oliver twilight s house

master sandfield ready kill friend, philip twilight, because believes philip has been courting woman loves, jane sunset. philip s servant, savourwit, prevents sandfield killing philip explaining match between philip , jane philip s father s doing , philip married! complicated story unfolds:

ten years ago, sir oliver twilight s wife , daughter, lady twilight , grace, kidnapped dunkirks (french marauders) crossing english channel on way jersey; consequently sold , separated. twilight didn t hear either of them until few months ago, when received letter saying wife s freedom bought 6 hundred crowns. twilight sent philip , savourwit jersey ransom money. on way there, philip , savourwit stopped in small town, wasted of money on women , partying. philip met , married young woman, grace. money gone , nothing show it, philip , savourwit returned home , told sir oliver lady twilight dead; told him philip s new wife grace long-lost daughter , ransom money had been spent buy freedom. entire scheme brainchild of savourwit, prides himself on knack invention .

sandfield congratulates savourwit on invention , makes philip. savourwit tells friends has new scheme in mind:

because sir oliver twilight believes long-lost daughter grace still maiden, has made arrangements marry off weatherwise, silly old fool. rid of weatherwise, savourwit tell sir oliver sandfield wants marry grace: sir oliver prefer sandfield suitor, because sandfield not require dowry. thus, sandfield can pretend marry grace (a marriage not legal because grace married philip) , philip can pretend marry jane (a marriage not legal because philip married grace). couples can live under sir oliver twilight s roof, maintaining appearances during day, , swapping spouses @ night. way, philip can still wife (even though has pretend sister during day) , sandfield can jane (even though have pretend sister-in-law during day).

lady goldenfleece, rich widow, enters, followed suitors: sir gilbert lambston, master pepperton, , master overdone. followed 2 old men, sir oliver twilight , master sunset, , daughters, grace twilight , jane sunset. savourwit notes lady goldenfleece s deceased husband notorious usurer; doubled wealth shortly before died seizing property of gentleman named master low-water.

lady goldenfleece greets jane , grace , alludes secret regarding girls. beg tell them secret is, refuses. in aside, jane says wishes lady goldenfleece more kind relatives, low-waters. exits except sir oliver twilight , savourwit. savourwit tells sir oliver sandfield desperate marry grace , take without dowry. sir oliver pleased , promises rid of weatherwise immediately. savourwit exits; weatherwise enters. sir oliver tells weatherwise has changed mind , not want him marry grace. weatherwise says become suitor lady goldenfleece.

scene 2: room in low-water s house

mistress low-water mourns family s ruin , curses lady goldenfleece. jane enters ask mistress low-water if knows mysterious secret lady goldenfleece alluded earlier. mistress low-water says might have piece of money or land bequeathed grace , jane departing friend on deathbed . jane mistress low-water , exits.

a footman enters letter mistress low-water sir gilbert lambston, wealthy knight. sir gilbert wants make mistress low-water mistress and, in letter, promises double previous offer of money if agrees. expects marry lady goldenfleece soon, , able pay mistress low-water sexual services. mistress low-water says sir gilbert s villainy makes feel sorry enemy lady goldenfleece. swears never become sir gilbert s mistress, says letter welcome, hinting has plan in mind.

sir gilbert enters. mistress low-water asks him give one-day consider offer. agrees , exits. master low-water enters. mistress low-water tells him thinks has way restore them former wealth. master low-water agrees go along plan.

scene 3: room in sir oliver twilight s house

a dutch merchant enters news sir oliver s wife: wonders why sir oliver hasn t sent ransom yet. sir oliver shocked hear wife still alive. tells merchant sent son , servant ransom ten weeks ago; brought daughter back, said wife had died. dutch merchant vows has seen lady twilight alive within past month , asks if can see daughter philip , savourwit brought them.

grace enters. dutch merchant says has seen before, @ inn in antwerp. grace worries has been found out , tells merchant must mistaken. merchant sees through savourwit s scheme; tells sir oliver has been deceived son , servant: wife not dead, , not real daughter. sir oliver isn t sure should believe. sends grace away. dutch merchant says must leave moment attend business matter. leaves little son in sir oliver s care , promises return soon.

savourwit enters , sir oliver confronts him merchant s allegations. savourwit denies all. cover himself, savourwit pretends have conversation in dutch merchant s little son, speaks in kind of pidgin english. savourwit s dutch pure gibberish (words such pisse surface occasionally). savourwit tells sir oliver boy has told him dutch merchant crazy, , prone telling wild tales. sir oliver still uncertain should believe.

the dutch merchant re-enters. sir oliver tells him savourwit has spoken son, claims dutch merchant crazy. after conferring son, dutch merchant says savourwit lying. sir oliver realizes has been deceived savourwit. invites dutch merchant stay @ home.

act ii

scene 1: room in weatherwise s house

lady goldenfleece dining @ weatherwise s home suitors, weatherwise, sir gilbert lambston, master pepperton , master overdone. suitors compete lady goldenfleece s attention. weatherwise obsessed almanacs, calendars, phases of moon, zodiac, etc. lambston aggressive suitor: gives lady goldenfleece big kiss in front of everyone. pepperton , overdone secretly agree work against lambston.

mistress low-water enters, disguised gallant gentleman ; husband, master low-water, poses servant. lady goldenfleece attracted gallant gentleman . gallant gentleman calls sir gilbert villain , gives lady goldenfleece letter in sir gilbert offered pay mistress low-water become mistress. lady goldenfleece shocked, , throws sir gilbert out. other suitors pleased see sir gilbert eliminated.

scene 2: street outside sir oliver twilight s house

sandfield, philip , savourwit worry might happen them scheme has been discovered. philip attempts commit suicide, savourwit , sandfield stop him.

lady twilight, philip s mother, enters. has been rescued captivity scholar, beveril, accompanies her. philip greets mother warmly , beveril rescuing mother. beveril, happens mistress low-water s brother, asks philip how sister doing. philip regretfully informs him of low-waters recent misfortune.

on savourwit s advice, philip takes mother aside, , confesses how faked death , spent ransom. after lady twilight agrees forgive transgressions, begs pretend grace sister. lady twilight agrees protect son.

scene 3: room in lady goldenfleece s house

mistress low-water , husband, still disguised gallant gentleman , servant, @ lady goldenfleece s house, waiting interview her. lady goldenfleece s suitors, weatherwise, pepperton , overdone arrive, , gallant gentleman scolds servant loudly, acting though lord of house. suitors assume gallant gentleman has married lady goldenfleece under noses. exit, disappointed.

lady goldenfleece enters , apologizes making gallant gentleman wait. after deal of heated flirting, gallant gentleman promises lady goldenfleece has never slept or courted other woman (these oaths are, of course, ironically true). lady goldenfleece swept off feet. kiss.

weatherwise, pepperton , overdone enter renewed hopes: servant has told them lady goldenfleece , gentleman haven t married yet. lady goldenfleece not happy see suitors. rid of them, kisses gallant gentleman , announces intention marry him, , exits. suitors exit.

the gallant gentleman asks lady goldenfleece s clown, pickadillie, if knows of can write entertainment wedding. pickadillie suggests scholar beveril. mistress low-water overjoyed see brother, remains in characters gallant gentleman. beveril says cannot compose entertainment wedding because lady goldenfleece has wronged sister. gallant gentleman encourages beveril withhold judgment until has made lady goldenfleece s acquaintance. lady goldenfleece enters. lady goldenfleece , beveril attracted each other.

act iii

scene 1: street near lady goldenfleece s house

weatherwise, pepperton , overdone meet sir gilbert lambston on street , tell him lady goldenfleece s engagement. vow find way disgrace lady goldenfleece. pickadillie enters , tells suitors beveril has been contracted compose entertainment lady goldenfleece s wedding.

beveril enters. speaking himself, says having trouble composing entertainment because has fallen madly in love lady goldenfleece. suitors introduce beveril , volunteer perform in wedding entertainment. beveril suggests play earth, air, fire , water. suitors exit, making plans poison entertainment , disgrace lady goldenfleece.

mistress low-water , husband enter, still disguised gallant gentleman , servant , , overhear beveril declaring secret love lady goldenfleece. mistress low-water quite pleased. says work bring brother , lady goldenfleece together.

act iv

scene 1: room in sir oliver twilight s house

sir oliver says happy have wife back. beveril rescuing , scolds philip , savourwit faking death. lady twilight says rumors of death circulating during philip , savourwit s time in jersey (a lie) , begs sir oliver excuse them because whole mix-up misunderstanding, not scheme.

sir oliver raises matter of minion (grace) philip , savourwit brought home pass off twilights daughter. lady twilight says able recognize true daughter because has seen several times since kidnapping (another lie). grace brought in. feigning jubilation, lady twilight says grace daughter. sir oliver apologizes philip , savourwit , admits them graces. problems out of way, continues make plans marry grace sandfield , philip jane. exits except lady twilight, grace, philip , savourwit.

lady twilight notes there peculiarly familiar grace s face, , asks grace s mother was. grace says doesn t know: , mother kidnapped dunkirks , separated ten years ago; knows mother english gentlewoman. lady twilight realizes grace true daughter; in fact, wearing earring lady twilight gave when baby. philip horrified learn has been sleeping sister. lady twilight tells philip sin of incest committed in ignorance, can forgiven. lady twilight , grace exit.

lamenting ill-fortune, philip says good-bye savourwit , says leaving home forever. savourwit convinces him stick around long enough see lady goldenfleece s wedding.

scene 2: room in lady goldenfleece s house

pickadillie observes servants make preparations lady goldenfleece s wedding.

scene 3: room in lady goldenfleece s house

music plays. lady goldenfleece , gallant gentleman, married, enter arm-in-arm. sir oliver twilight, master sunset, dutch merchant, lady twilight, grace, jane sunset, philip, savourwit, master sandfield , master low-water (disguised servant) follow. master low-water tells wife beveril still infatuated lady goldenfleece. mistress low-water asks him if has prepared letter . master low-water says has.

beveril enters introduce entertainment. entertainment begins. lady goldenfleece s former suitors enter, dressed fire (sir gilbert lambston), air (weatherwise), water (overdone) , earth (pepperton). rather reciting parts beveril has composed, each suitor recites speech insulting lady goldenfleece. when entertainment finished, suitors reveal true identities , exit, satisfied have fulfilled vow see lady goldenfleece disgraced. beveril apologizes fiasco. lady goldenfleece forgives him. lady goldenfleece says night wedding guests, spend night @ house.

act v

scene 1: room in lady goldenfleece s house

lady goldenfleece urges new husband , come bed. resists her, claiming cannot enjoy marriage because knows lady goldenfleece s fortune wrongfully acquired. lady goldenfleece begs him reconsider, not relent. exits heavy heart.

master low-water enters , tells wife has delivered letter wrote beveril. beveril enters on balcony, reading letter aloud. letter supposedly lady goldenfleece, written lady low-water. in letter, lady goldenfleece tells beveril disappointed in marriage because gallant gentleman has forsaken bed without cause. begs beveril come chamber counsel her. delighted, beveril exits, on way lady goldenfleece s chamber.

sir oliver twilight, lady twilight, master sunset, grace, philip, sandfield, jane, dutch merchant , savourwit enter. gallant gentleman tells them has heard strange noises coming lady goldenfleece s bedroom , suspects cheating on him on night of wedding. door lady goldenfleece s chamber forced open. lady goldenfleece discovered inside beveril. feigning rage, gallant gentleman swears never admit lady goldenfleece bed long lives, banishes house , claims of wealth own.

following pleas leniency sir oliver, gallant gentleman agrees leave casket containing half of lady goldenfleece s wealth. prepares leave, gallant gentleman says that, if wanted to, release lady goldenfleece marriage contract few words, leaving free remarry. present wonders how possible. lady goldenfleece begs gallant gentleman tell how can regain freedom. gallant gentleman says tell if promises remarry immediately. lady goldenfleece promises.

the gallant gentleman reveals goldenfleece s marriage contract void because married! lady goldenfleece shocked. in order honor promise remarry immediately, , spite gallant gentleman , announces next husband beveril. gallant gentleman feigns torment. sir gilbert, sir oliver , beveril note gallant gentleman s days numbered; punishment having 2 wives hanging. gallant gentleman says that, although married, not have 2 wives. provide solution riddle, reveals true identity mistress low-water.

sir oliver decides time draw marriage contracts sandfield & grace , philip & jane. lady goldenfleece protests jane cannot marry philip because is, in fact, sister! while wonders going on, lady goldenfleece explains lady sunset switched girls when infants because worried husband go bankrupt. philip overjoyed: woman married sunset s daughter, , not relation of his. sandfield overjoyed: gets marry jane, woman wanted marry along.

epilogue

weatherwise ends play epilogue filled characteristic references almanacs , phases of moon. consulting almanac, predicts play end great applause.